Keeping It Real
by Dionna Sanchez
Grocery store tensions
I have to make a weekly trip to the grocery store. With three growing children, the food goes quickly around our house!
I must admit that I prefer going to the grocery store alone. If my husband tags along he usually tries to throw "extra's" into the cart and if my children tag along they can distract me from comparing prices or hurrying through this necessary task as quickly as possible. At times I admit, I tersely tell them to "be quiet so I can think!" But nothing compares to the feeling I get when I see other moms with their children in the grocery store.
I don't know what happens to a mom when she needs to buy food for her family with her children around - but I think it's close to "paranoia" and "schizophrenia." I have been astonished as I've watched mothers yank on their children's arms, shove them out of the way of my cart, and firmly grip them by the neck as they usher them to the side of the aisle. I've seen children smacked, yelled at, and generally ridiculed in front of others.
Moms - WHAT ARE WE DOING???? Is it really worth hurting your child's arm or neck because they accidentally were in the way of another person's cart? How about "Tommy, watch where you are going okay?" Is it necessary to belittle your precious child because they accidentally threw two cans of soup on top of the bread?? Can't you just explain to them why heavier things smash the lighter things?
I have been horrified at our behavior. I see these children's eyes when "mom" can only see her anger. It breaks my heart. And it's gotten me to see how I took my own children's behavior in far too serious of a manner when shopping.
My girls have watched as moms have done these things to their children. Their eyes are wide-eyed and they take it all in. And do you know what I do when we are onlookers to one of these incidents? I wrap my arms around my girls and I tell them, "I love you." And they tell me, "I love you too, mommy."
I don't know why women act this way in grocery stores or other stores for that matter. I do know it's the "dark-side" of mothering that shames me because the emotions hit too close to home.
I wish I could appeal to any compassion in any mother and beg her, "Please, PLEASE do NOT handle your children physically or emotionally so roughly! If you could only see yourself in a mirror you would weep at your own ugly behavior."
I remember a day when I would watch moms beam and glow over their children. They would brag over them and laugh at their mistakes as they learned and grew. I don't know what happened to this kind of mothering, but if it's gone extinct then the future of our world is in great distress.
Lord - let me be a mother to make my children proud. Let me teach them kindness, gentleness, patience, compassion, joy, self-control, and long-suffering. No squished Twinkie could ever matter as much.
Dionna Sanchez is the Founder of the Emphasis On Moms Ministry where you can get a monthly newsletter delivered to your email box free. For more info go to: http://www.EmphasisOnMoms.com/newsletter.htm
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